Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
