My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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