I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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