Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Randomize