I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
she peed on how many people?
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize