Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize