sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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