clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
