THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
