My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
