im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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