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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  A better fuck for starters.

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• (320): View more from Minnesota

  It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.

  (406): View more from Montana

  Ok, i'm coming over

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.

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• (831): View more from California

  maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick

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  Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (203): View more from Connecticut

  i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Some girl just showed me her stretch marks

  (757): View more from Virginia

  You need to get out of tn

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.

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  25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks

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• (916): View more from California

  Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about

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• (925): View more from California

  Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?

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• (206): View more from Washington

  listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you

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