So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.