so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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