is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Randomize