Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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