i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
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I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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