She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize