It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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