if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
