Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(925): View more from California

2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?

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(925) 2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you? http://tfl.nu/l1ls

Replies (11) Good night (915) Bad night (1237)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.

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(508): For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality. http://tfl.nu/clti

Replies (6) Good night (1489) Bad night (774)
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(801): View more from Utah

Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail

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(801): Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail http://tfl.nu/5fc6

Replies (47) Good night (4735) Bad night (1112)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".

(781): View more from Massachusetts

It was only one, it doesn't count.

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(978): I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES". (781): It was only one, it doesn't count. http://tfl.nu/lfgz

Replies (30) Good night (1502) Bad night (4187)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict

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(860): you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict http://tfl.nu/am6o

Replies (11) Good night (2571) Bad night (2246)
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(817): View more from Texas

I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.

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(817): I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve. http://tfl.nu/17gc

Replies (12) Good night (8307) Bad night (1126)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon

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(201): PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon http://tfl.nu/nm2q

Replies (14) Good night (4776) Bad night (1526)
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(770): View more from Georgia

Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives

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(770): Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives http://tfl.nu/9ndz

Replies (6) Good night (2367) Bad night (1098)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!

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(504): As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!! http://tfl.nu/d5pb

Replies (18) Good night (3302) Bad night (812)
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(952): View more from Minnesota

He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.

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(952): He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan. http://tfl.nu/7ucr

Replies (17) Good night (988) Bad night (1692)
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(618): View more from Illinois

Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!

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(618): Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!! http://tfl.nu/jiww

Replies (11) Good night (1921) Bad night (996)
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(678): View more from Georgia

I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.

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(678): I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor. http://tfl.nu/habo

Replies (2) Good night (534) Bad night (984)
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(805): View more from California

I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.

(310): View more from California

When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.

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(805): I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food. (310): When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis. http://tfl.nu/o33e

Replies (2) Good night (615) Bad night (277)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life

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(615): hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life http://tfl.nu/rfd4

Replies (1) Good night (440) Bad night (241)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad

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(978): When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad http://tfl.nu/mtrk

Replies (3) Good night (807) Bad night (182)

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