my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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