Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
