I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
