Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
