$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
