Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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