i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Randomize
