i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
