i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
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