Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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