I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts