oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
