I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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