yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize