Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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