I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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