I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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