i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
