Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Bring me that man meat
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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