I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
