are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Randomize