Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
