I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Randomize
