You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
