I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.