Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
this boner is exhausting
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
