Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Vodka?
Forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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