That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize
