Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
