my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
