Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
